Tuesday 29 October 2019

Freddy vs Jason


2003’s Freddy vs Jason, written and directed by Ronny Yu.

Starring Robert Englund, Ken Kirzinger, Monica Keena, Jason Ritter, Kelly Rowland, Chris Marquette, Garry Chalk, Lochlyn Munro, Brendan Fletcher, and Kyle Labine.

What is it about?

Nightmare on Elm Street horror icon Freddy Krueger lies forgotten in hell, with no way to terrorize the teenagers of Springwood, Ohio, in their dreams anymore. Eager to get back in on the action, he recruits fellow horror icon Jason Voorhees (from the Friday the 13th series) to increase the level of terror amongst teens so that Freddy can resurrect himself again. The only problem with Freddy’s plan, is that Jason proves himself so effective at eliminating teens that there could be no one left for Freddy once it’s all said and done. Freddy has to figure out how to un-create the monster he’s resurrected, a task easier said than done when Jason may be as un-killable as Freddy is unquenchable.


Why is it worth seeing?

After 7 Nightmare on Elm Street films, and 10 Friday the 13th films, it was pretty clear that there existed a market for combining the sadistic nightmare imagery of Freddy Krueger with the straight ahead hillbilly macabre of Jason Voorhees. It turns out that the meeting of the 2 minds actually sat in development hell for years, before finally coming to multiplexes in 2003. I’m not sure why, as the material practically writes itself. For anyone who ever wanted to watch these 2 titans bang and clash against each other’s grisly bodies, the film delivers.


After a great deal of screen time previously devoted to demented figures killing teenagers, we ought to know what to expect by now. Freddy, ever the consummate showman, twisted and allegorical in the psychological tormenting of his victims, finds new prey to torture. His lack of satisfaction in his obscene body count in movies past speaks to a greater need that his franchise could never explain. But even the briefest of exposition regarding Freddy’s motivations is a Ph.D thesis in comparison to the hollowness that is Jason Voorhees’ backstory. His alleged invincibility is his most captivating feature- making for a rotten dude about as interesting as a dull machete. At least the script by Damien Shannon and Mark Swift understands that Jason is just as vulnerable in his Freddy controlled dreams as anyone else is, leading (briefly) to the most interesting exchanges of the movie- before ping pong game sounds are inserted for maximum comedic effect.


If only there were some characters to keep the 2 killers company. Bringing back the hungry horror titans requires plenty of fresh meat, and the perfectly bland assortment of non descript teens (dependably played by actors well past voting age) comes in handy for a film needing a moderate body count. Like any slasher film, it recognizes that you wouldn’t want to make anybody here too captivating, as well… see you later. Director Ronny Yu (who knows a little something about romance after his, Bride of Chucky), brings some pretty uninspiring sequences, preferring to cover up the lack of inspiration with green and especially blue lenses. Other than an iconic dock scene (with just one of the titular characters), he relies heavily on lightning strobe lights, and jump scares to try to jolt people awake who could be forgiven for snoozing while waiting for the main event to show up. When it finally does, it delivers- in a way that never could satisfy any more than Graeme Revell’s aggro guitar crunch score could. It’s likely the most inspirational thing about the film is that it didn’t inspire a host of sequels- getting laughed at for watching it once is enough.


Rating:
2.5/5



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